The Rich Old Bastard

Why Are There So Many Idiots In The World?

Young Apprentice; I am so tired of dealing with idiots all day! Why are there so many idiots in the world?

Rich Old Bastard; Your question reminds me of something I once heard the late comedian George Carlin say. To paraphrase; “Think of how dumb the average person is, then realize that 50% of the population is even dumber.”

Y.A.; True that.

R.O.B.; But to answer your question, the simple reason for the abundance of idiots is that there are so many people in the world. In a population of seven billion, a certain percentage of them will be left handed (10% according to Ned Flanders), a certain percentage will have brown eyes, and a certain percentage will be idiots. It’s a numbers game.

Y.A.; I guess that makes sense, but why must the idiot percentage be so high?

R.O.B.; It’s a matter of relativity.

Y.A.; Yeah, my relatives are idiots too!

R.O.B.; I don’t doubt it, but that’s not what I meant by “relativity”. People tend to measure others’ intelligence relative to their own. The more intelligent someone is, the more idiots there seem to be by comparison. To the world’s most intelligent person, (whom ever that may be) almost everyone must seem like a total idiot relative to him/her self.

Y.A.; Wow, I must be a genius!

R.O.B.; Perhaps.

Y.A.; So if smart people think the world is full of idiots, idiots must must believe almost everyone is smarter than they are and other idiots are their equals.

R.O.B.; Ironically, that is not the case. On the contrary, the fact that they are idiots causes them to assume that they are smart and everyone else is an idiot. For example, if an idiot hears an expert speak about some topic which the idiot thinks he knows about, he (the idiot) will not understand what the expert is talking about. Consequently, he (the non-idiot) will seem like an idiot for not agreeing with the many erroneous ideas floating around in the head of the actual idiot.

Y.A.; So smart people think the world is full of idiots, and they are right, whereas dumb people think the world is full of idiots…and they are wrong?

R.O.B.; Precisely!